Not So Fast

They’re giving away a free ticket to space.

The comedy calculator.

You know how beer is just lacking something? Yeah, Anheiser Busch is making caffeinated beer.

Even though The Lemon is gone, his magnum opus A Timeline of the Internet is still available. It deserves to be remembered.

Hamlet.

via Fark

Shatner’s new album will be out tomorrow. Probably you should go get in line now to beat the rush.

Next up, polygamy.

Hmm.

Apparently, it’s not as big a deal as everyone thought.

Disney is going to make a Bloom County movie. 20 years late, but other than that, what could go wrong?

via Fark

Hey, great another volcano erupting. Earthquakes and volcanoes this week. The plates, they are a-shifting.

Mount St. Helens. Freaking USDA Forest Service webcam is down.

UPDATE: Oh, wait, the webcam is back up. And down. Good luck with that.

FURTHER UPDATE: A local blog. Update 9 is funny

Tivo and Netflix are working together to become one giant media delivery conglomerate.

So, if I’m not going to massively overclock my CPU is water cooling all that? I love the idea of a silent computer though.

Why can’t I buy entire seasons of Good Eats?

Since the news is boring me and I’m hungry and have a zucchini at home I have to use up soon, here’s what I’ll be making for dinner.

1 1/2 cups shredded zucchini
1 (4-ounce) can chopped green chiles
1 1/2 cups thinly sliced green onions
1 cup cooked rice
3/4 cup shredded pepper jack cheese
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
3/4 cup fat-free sour cream
6 tablespoons salsa

While tortillas are warming, heat a non-stick skillet coated with cooking spray over medium-high heat until hot. Add zucchini, chiles, and green onions and saute for 3 minutes or until tender. Stir in the rice, cheese, salt, and pepper and cook for 1 minute, stirring constantly. Remove from heat and stir in the sour cream.

Substitute fresh bell pepper for the green chilies and minus the sour cream. And downsize it to however much looks like I want to eat, of course.

Man, I’m hungry.

Some want caffiene addiction to be classified as a mental disorder.

I can quit anytime I want.

I wonder if it annoys the other planets?

Apparently mutant, albino, ex-lab rats are the fittest.

via Fark

I admit, I kinda like the look of the new $50. Well, the front anyway.

It’s like a Magic 8 Ball for your wrist! Neato.

National Geographic photos staged. But they admit it and apologize.

And who looks at the pictures that closely?

via Instapundit.

Naturally the stoned slackers are better educated. Let’s see—go to college, spend a an unknown amout of years partying and perhaps learning something or go work construction? Any slacker worth their salt is going to go to college.

If you are insulted by the vague stereotypes in this post, please don’t tell me about it. Unless you are funny. Then feel free. And try it out on someone first. Just because you think you are funny doesn’t mean the rest of us do. Thanks for your help.

If nothing else, more Starbucks will raise the overall quality of coffee all over America.

Over at Right Wing News.

“Democrats are truly united behind one man: George W. Bush, whom they hope to push into a moat full of crocodiles. Rabid crocodiles. Rabid crocs who just finished with Ann Coulter and are mad that she was even considered to be a suitable appetizer.”

Teh funnay.

A 5.9 earthquake is moderate? The 6.3 in Iran a while ago was major. Must have to be over 6.0 to be a biggie.

Probably this isn’t a bad idea.

The Mount St. Helens volcano cam.

via Fark

Adobe proposed a new raw image format, the DNG. Will it catch on? Does this mean I have to buy an upgrade to Photoshop?

Galactic collision

The AOL takeover of Time-Warner was peanuts compared to this merger, he added.

The Weekend’s Useless Post.

Don’t tell Joe that the WUP is the best part of his blog.

Trips to space coming soon. Sadly they aren’t free.

Google may be developing a web browser.

A carnival I can get behind.

You may not have been following this story, but a federal judge has allowed Twinkies to live another month. You might want to stock up now. Good thing they last forever.

Okay, so they are kidnapping potential allies, who were trying to rebuild the infrastructure of the country. Who side, exactly, are they on?

Obviously I can never leave my computer again. The complete Calvin and Hobbes is coming. Hurray!

I’ll start saving now.

Han Solo in lego. Life size.

Google.

On Jimmy.

Naturally when I heard that I was shocked. As hard as I tried I just could not wrap my mind around what I was reading. I just couldn’t believe it was true. Jimmy Swaggart still has a television program?

Old, I know, but I’m still catching up, okay?

I leave for a week and Joyful Christian comes back. Anything else happen you guys aren’t telling me about?

Lileks sums up how I feel about it. It’s a big world out there, so I might have missed it, but I have yet to read a “neocon” mention they want to reinstate the draft. It seems to be the “progressive/Democrat” thing to worry about.

UPDATE: I should have kept reading before I posted. Instapundit.

Okay, we had this idea here at lunch about 3 weeks ago. Who knew it was comedy gold?

What I learned on my vacation:

1. I really like Wyoming. I mean, what I saw of it. Which would be all the major cities and the road between them.

2. Coffee south of Montana is teh suX0rs. Starbucks, people! Or just make some coffee with some flavor to it if you want to avoid the whole “chain taking over the world” thing. Starbucks isn’t even that good, but it’s better than the alternatives, obviously. If you must use Folgers, put twice as much in as is recommended. Try it, you may like it.

2a. McDonald’s should use Seattle’s Best coffee at all their stores.

3. Sinclair Gas’ logo with the dinosaur looks just like the Krispy Kreme logo from a distance.

4. Toll roads–I’m looking at you Colorado–suck. You just get your groove going and “toll plaza 1 mile,” get back up to speed and “toll plaza 5 miles”. Argh. Not to mention it cost me $5.25 for the privilege of using their highway.

5. As I was just getting groceries right now, I realized I was no longer the friendliest person around. Yeah, smile at your customers once in a while, you’ll be amazed at how well it works.

6. Idaho drivers are teh suX0rs. But we have the coolest plates.

Oklahoma: very nice but hot and humid.

Texas: ditto.

Kansas: a very relaxing drive except for the guy with the plates “NERVOUS” and the wind

In case you are wondering, I’ve been vacationing. And today I finally figured out the proper address to log in. Bookmarks are handy, but dangerous when you don’t have them. Anyway , Montana was “meh”, Wyoming was quite nice and sorry Colorado, but you just don’t measure up. And what is with the toll road? That just sucks.

Hopefully nothing of vital importance happens in the world, cause I won’t be around to comment on it.

Since I blog at work, I don’t blog in pajamas. Carry on with your day.

What are the poor kids under six doing with their days?

Men typically had more leisure than women, with 5.4 hours compared to 4.8 hours. Those with children under the age of six had the least time off — at 4.0 leisure hours.

How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb. It just rolls off the tongue.

So, the memo implosion continues.

Well, my hits have jumped through the roof the last two days. Wherever y’all are coming from, thanks.

Frank fills in for Cox&Forkum. Sort of.

The new CXT.

“It’s not going to fit into the standard garage,” said Mark Oberle, a spokesman for Navistar, based in Warrenville, Ill., outside Chicago. “We can see it a as a vehicle for business people who want to make distinct impression. For personal use, it’s for people who want to make a statement.”

Dear Paul,

You aren’t helping.

Thanx,
Kristin

Apparently, &# 34;End of the World&# 34; is coming.

The newly minted Ra^thergate has the links.

Starbucks sent me free coffee! And some poems that didn’t rhyme, but that’s not important right now. Yeah, not the greatest coffee in the world, but c’mon, they are a. available everywhere and b. giving out free coffee. Marketing genius!

iVan

Wanna help at the Ansari X Prize? Sign up now. Sounds like fun.

via Slashdot

This guy thinks he can do it.

via Fark

Hurray! Now I can be my slacker self and not suffer for it.

Lots and lots about The Memo over at the Command Post.

TVs that zoom. What fun.

Or he’s just really, really upset.

In an interview with the New Yorker, Gore, who says he’s a Southern Baptist, expressed disdain for Bush’s public declaration of his faith.

Plank, meet mote. Mote, plank.

Oh look, Butler died.

Well, if you want to see something appalling, check out the pictures people voluntarily send in for people to rate.

I’ll be out this afternoon, I have to go copyright G, C, D, and E so I can sue all those lousy musicians using them without permission.

“As for carrying out preventive strikes against terrorist bases, we will take all measures to liquidate terrorist bases in any region of the world,” Col.-Gen. Yuri Baluyevsky, chief of the Russian General Staff, told reporters.

Seems like someone ought to do it. I wonder what they are going to do about their buddies, the Iranians.

Kerry is having a rough day over at Instapundit.

Hey, look! Tony’s back.

Should Star Trek die?

I say as it is, yes. BUT, if they would let Robert Hewitt Wolfe do another series that would change my answer. DS9 was great, and Andromeda, while he was producer, rocked too.

No, really, read the interview. Funny.

Floppies are slowly dying out. Yeah, I’ll miss my Windows98 boot disk.

It may not be too many years before floppy disks are joined by DVDs. Microsoft founder Bill Gates (news – web sites) recently predicted the DVD would be obsolete within a decade.

It took 30 years to get rid of floppies, but DVDs will be gone soon. Right.

Mark Steyn.

There’s enough oil for everyone.

“If you look at the supply and demand balance, the world has enough oil,” Yusgiantoro told reporters at an industry conference in Sydney. “Why is the price so high, it’s the political premium.

Beaker and Dr. Bunsen Honeydew are the most popular TV scientists.

via Slashdot

Psychologists discover good parenting.

Recent studies of adults who were overindulged as children paint a discouraging picture of their future. Kids who’ve been given too much too soon grow up to be adults who have difficulty coping with life’s disappointments. They have a distorted sense of entitlement that gets in the way of success both in the workplace and in relationships.

Soon they’ll be telling us a spanking now and then might be helpful when raising children. Maybe then we all can go grocery shopping without having to deal with some kid throwing a tantrum in the middle of the aisle.

Hurricane Frances rain water. To go with your Mount St. Helens ash.

No more DirectX.

Lileks makes a point with pictures. I know he’s talking about the poor writing in an article, but it just reminds me that those bastards have to be stopped.

Not as elegant as it could be, I think, but still pretty nifty.

EO predicts the future of the blog world. Oddly enough, he thinks religion will become the next hot topic.

New internet speed record. Well, internet 2.

via Fark

This is terrible. I like books.

Remind me never to get in a position where I am depending on Russian special forces for rescue.

UPDATE: Shot in the back.

Instapundit has about a thousand links this afternoon.

Chechnya!

SETI found some radio signals that:

a. Are from aliens
b. Are natural phenomena
c. Are caused by the telescope itself
d. all of the above
e. none of the above

Michael Moore on the RNC. He’s upset that:

a. Bush has sent troops to Iraq

I would like to hear him say he knows what it means to love your children and that he, in good conscience, cannot send any more children to their deaths.

b. Bush is not sending enough troops to catch bin Laden

The other thing I would like to hear tonight is: Why haven’t you caught Osama bin Laden? You’ve had three years to find him. The man killed nearly 3,000 people here on our soil.

Stampede at Ikea.

A rerelease of the Hitchhiker’s Guide game is coming.

How else could you use the phrase “alien babes” in a news article.

via Fark

Scott is funny.

It occurs to me that with a little judicious editing, They Might Be Giants’ song New York City would make a great little flash thingy starring Bush and Cheney.

Dave Barry on the Republican Convention. And the Democratic Convention actually. Now I have “The Hustle” stuck in my head.

The Jedi Academy is opening in Romania.

Michael Moore on the Republican Convention. He does manage, barely, to tie the essay in with the convention.

The internet is 35. That means there’s a whole generation of nerds that have no idea what it would be like not to have it. I have no idea what the implications of that are.

Yes, and I’m sure there are no US spies in Israel too. It sort of knocks the whole “Israel is running America” thing out of whack though. If they were running America, I don’t think they would need spies, they could just demand the info.

They’re working on it. Give them time.

via Slashdot

All the RNC bloggers in one convienent location.

The world is safer than ever.

Microsoft has blogs.

Argentina?

I miss Michael Jordan.

I still have no idea why World War I was fought.

I’m sure that it wasn’t just because Archduke Ferdinand was shot. That was the excuse, sure, but whoever he is and whatever position he held, that wasn’t the cause of the war. They never really covered that in history class.

More on the next Muppet Movie. I miss Jim.

via Drudge Report

Bob Dole? The guy who did those Pepsi ads? What does he have to do with the presidential election?

Bush’s new strategery.

Ronin Thought of the Day

Study shows that drinking soda daily can cause weight gain and diabetes.

That’s according to a new study that links significant weight gain and higher risk of type 2 diabetes in women who drink soda daily.

Duh.

Stamp taxes have doubled in the last 5 years.

Glenn Renyold’s TCS column has the coolest graphic, and it’s interesting too.

I have no need for a wristwatch television, but it’s good to know they are out there. These are great times to be alive.

“Janus”, what a great name for DRM technology.

An interview with a worker that survived Chernoyl.

via Slashdot

Alice Cooper has a good point.

“If you’re listening to a rock star in order to get your information on who to vote for, you’re a bigger moron than they are. Why are we rock stars? Because we’re morons. We sleep all day, we play music at night and very rarely do we sit around reading the Washington Journal.”

Don’t they realize that soon a whole page of purple marks will strike the same fear in the hearts of students as the red did? And in the meantime, they’re just making it harder to count the errors correctly.

Lucas hopes to beat the Star Wars franchise into the ground. And then give it a good kick.

via Slashdot

Good news, because when I go to Mars, I don’t want to be looking through a wimpy little window.

via Slashdot.