The gene for the smell of the seaside has been isolated and can now be bottled for, um, bottling purposes.
The last paragraph of the article are the most important, however.
A more controversial figure from Siffkey’s past was its rector, Rev Harold Davidson, who was defrocked in 1932 after allegedly ‘cavorting with’ London prostitutes. He later joined a circus and died after being mauled to death by a lion in Skegness. The UEA scientists are hoping to avoid such a fate, said Prof Johnston!
That’s just awesome.
Not So Fast 
I never though I would ever read a paragraph like that. I felt like I was reading a MadLib.
It’s got it all; weird place names, a rector, defrocking, cavorting, a circus, prostitutes, mauling by lions.
Seriously. Mad. Lib. I couldn’t have written a better one if I had tried.